On spontaneously walking up to fellow amputees and saying “Hi”
I’m sure this isn’t unique to myself, but I thought I’d share anyways.
The other week I was taking Wifey out shopping (because I’m an awesome husband), and when out we walked into a video game store (because I’m also proficient in nerdisms) I noticed another guy who looked in his late teens or early 20s in crutches. Since I’m a bit nosey by nature, I instinctively looked to his feet, and noticed he only had one leg. I couldn’t tell if he was an above-knee or below-knee amputee, but still, it was there (or rather, it wasn’t :P).
My first instinct was to walk up to him and say “Hi” and see how he was going, purely on the basis of him being an amputee, but I hesitated… I mean, I’m pretty comfortable with having only one leg and talking to people about it, but I know not all amputees feel this way. What if the loss of his limb and talking about it upset him? What if he misinterpreted my good intentions and thought I was poking fun at him or drawing unnecessary attention? What if he’s actually been a long-term amputee and his stump was knackered, and the reason he was getting around the place on crutches was because of that and thought I was being condesecending? I was wearing shorts that day with the titanium pole exposed so he would have easily been able to see I was a fellow amputee, but still, I was worried.
So I didn’t say anything, because I was concerned about coming off without the good intentions that I had.
The question I’m asking myself aloud is – is it cool to go up to a fellow amputee and just say “Hi” and ask how they’re doing?
It’s weird, whenever I see another amputee out and about I always have that urge. I know it must be human instinct, but still – that little voice of hesitation is always there.
One of the few times I’ve acted on it was a feew years ago when I was walking to catch a train home after Uni finished for the day – I was walking with Wifey (well, she wasn’t Wifey back then since we weren’t married :P) and came to a stop along the footpath where one of gates for bike/vehicle access to the Uni was located. As I was standing there or walking up to it, I noticed a guy on his bike had one leg. So, being the person I am, I stopped for a chat. I was also my usual subtle self, pointing to his leg and stating, “Hey, I have one of those too”. The guy looked at me with this kind of inquisitive look (possibly verging on delivering a headbutt) so I reached down and pulled up the leg on my jeans, revealing my prosthesis like the shining symbol of awesome gimpyness that it is.
And that was it – I reckon we stood and chatted for about 20 minutes, exchanging stories and experiences, before I realised I wasn’t going to catch the train on time if I didn’t hustle. While I did catch the train on time, I didn’t have enough of a buffer to grab a couple of freshly fried cinnamon doughnuts from the doughnut place. Bummer. Would have been a perfect afternoon then 🙂
Going back to my original story – owing to this happening, I’m looking at ways that maybe I can get involved in the wider amputee community. I’m not sure in what capacity at this stage, but I’ve been meaning to join the forums over at the excellent Limbs 4 Life website, which I’ve mentioned previously and currently have links setup on the blog’s sidebar so people can easily access the site from here. I’m not such how else I want to involve myself in the community at this stage (there’s ultimately only so much time free during the week), though Wifey’s been really supportive and has encouraged me to get more involved and help other people out due to my positive attitude towards my leg.
Autumn 2010 cover of amplified
For those who haven’t checked out their site before, I’d encourage you to stop by and check it out – they’ve also recently released the latest edition of amplified, a quarterly magazine published via their website as a high quality PDF. I took the time to read through the latest issue in full (thanks Wifey 🙂 ), and there were some great articles and personal experiences therein. There’s also (as of next issue) going to be the chance for amputees to write in and ask questions. Best of all is that it’s free, so no cost for access to an extremely professional publication on a niche topic. Brilliant work.
Hmmm, I think I got sidetracked there, sorry about that!
Anywho, just wanted to share the irrational side of my personality when it comes to seeing other amputees. Hopefully I’m not the only one 😛
